Obeah woman’s daughter refuses to marry me

Dear Pastor,

I am seeking your advice. I read your column enough to know that you are a really good counsellor. I have been living with a woman for three years. I proposed marriage to her and she turned me down. I couldn't understand why, because I try my best to take care of her. One day I met a man and by talking, I found out that the woman I am living with was his past girlfriend. I was surprise.

When he realised we were together, he clammed up. He did not want to say much. A friend of his joined our conversation and I told his friend what I had just found out. His friend told me that he wished me well, but I should be very careful with that woman because she has a particular reputation.

I know that when some men say that a woman has a reputation, they mean that she is bad. However, for the three years that I have known this woman, I cannot accuse her of having another man with me. What I can say is that she is an obeah worker. She believes in obeah. So when I was told to be careful with her, the man meant that she may try to tie me to her.

I told a relative about what I heard and she took me to see a man who has a 'gift', and he assured me that this woman has not tried to tie me or to work obeah on me. I would like to get married because I am tired of being single. Do you believe in obeah working?

I told her recently what I heard and she said she is not an obeah woman, but her mother is one. She said that she will never work obeah on me. She said that people who say these things about her do so because they hate her. This may sound strange to you, pastor. I really would like to get your opinion.

A.F.

Dear A.F.,

If you love this woman you should marry her. Perhaps she is not eager to get married, so don't push her. Not all women are eager to get married. However, when she is ready, you should marry her.

She told you that her mother is an obeah woman, but she is not involved. That is not difficult to understand. Perhaps she wants more time to watch you, to observe whether you would make her a good husband. It is not everything you hear, you ought to believe. So I repeat, marry the woman when the time is right.

Pastor