Need help to fight my depression

Dear Pastor,

I am in my mid-60s and I am a widow. I have been retired for a year but I work part-time in my field. I often read your column and I have done so for years.

I find myself being lonely quite a lot even in a crowd. I can't seem to shake a feeling of deep despair at times. I know that I can't give in to it. I try to self-talk every day and I have to admit that it is what it is: depression.

Do you offer free counselling or at best a discounted rate? I just feel that the time has come where I just need to talk to a professional, even for a few minutes. I do try to talk to some friends and family members, but they don't understand as they all think that I'm the bravest, strongest person that they know. I'm struggling here. Please help me out. I used to think that only weak persons feel this way. But I have to admit that mental health is just as real as hypertension and diabetes.

Y.B.

Dear Y.B.,

I want to assure you that no one is too old to feel depressed. Children experience depression, teenagers the same, women in their 40s and beyond.

You are very fortunate that you have worked hard and you are retired. You are still able to work and take care of yourself. But even the Lord Jesus experienced depression. He said it when he exclaimed, "My soul is extremely sorrowful even unto death."

I have met many people who have experienced depression. It is not something that can be shaken off. Some people get so depressed that they have to seek medication. So you are doing the correct thing today by asking me to help you. When I meet people like you, there is no need for me to ask for a fee. What I try to do is to get them to see that they should not blame themselves for the way they feel, but rather they should seek to find out what has brought on the depression and learn how to overcome it.

Being overweight can cause depression. Depression can be a response to stress and anxiety. There are various types of causes, including biochemical and social. This is where a trained counsellor or psychologist can help. Depression should be taken into hand because it can lead even to suicide. I do not say these things to scare you, but to encourage you to take your situation seriously. I will send you the name, telephone number and address of a psychologist who will be glad to meet with you.

Pastor