Doctor urges medical help over blend-up and home remedies

Valentine's Day is supposed to be about roses, romance and fireworks behind closed doors. But for some men, the pressure to perform can turn Cupid's big night into a quiet nightmare.

The candlelight, the lingerie, the silent expectation of a flawless night -- all of it can unravel in seconds when performance anxiety creeps in. In a desperate bid to stay ahead of that fear, some men turn to alcohol, pills, herbal blends or home-made concoctions, hoping for a quick confidence boost.

However, instead of saving the moment, these substances can sometimes add to the pressure, masking the real issue while the anxiety quietly tightens its grip.

Urologist Dr Elon Thompson says it is a pattern he sees far too often, and is urging men to seek professional help instead of experimenting behind closed doors.

"I've never been a doctor who bashes naturopathic medicine," Thompson said. "I just want persons to understand what they're putting into their bodies."

He acknowledges that natural remedies and bedroom boosters are deeply woven into Jamaican culture, but cautions that not every solution works for everyone.

"Not everyone is going to benefit from the oats blend up -- Dragon, Supligen -- that concoction. Some persons will swear by it. But I'm sure there are persons who would need to be investigated for other causes that may be affecting them," he said.

Among the most common performance issues facing men are low testosterone levels, erectile dysfunction, and premature ejaculation. Some men struggle with one issue; others face multiple challenges at the same time. Yet, despite how widespread these concerns are, many still suffer in silence.

"Some persons push it off as not being a significant issue and say, 'Boy, you're soft.' That makes it a challenge because men don't come forward. These issues get put on the backburner and they're not dealt with," Thompson said.

That culture of ridicule and dismissal, he explained, often delays treatment. Instead of addressing a medical concern, men internalise the shame -- especially around emotionally charged moments like Valentine's Day.

Thompson insists that persistent problems should never be ignored.

"If you notice leading up to that time, and even after, that you're having an issue, then I would suggest you seek medical attention," the doctor said.

Encouragingly, Thompson said more couples are facing their issues together. He said many women are now accompanying their partners to appointments, offering support rather than blame.

"I think as society continues to evolve, I think more and more we will see where relationships are stronger," he said.

Interestingly, while he cannot say definitively whether sexual health problems are increasing or whether more men are simply speaking up, one shift is clear.

"What I've noticed is that there are younger men who are now coming forward with sexual-function problems," he said.

"So maybe the message about seeking help is getting out. Maybe it is that there are more men who are being affected with sexual problems," he said.

And for women who may experience disappointment in the bedroom this Valentine's weekend, Thompson said one of the best things they can do for their partners is to encourage then to seek help, rather than leaving them to suffer in silence.