Should I get pregnant for my older boyfriend?

August 16, 2019

Dear Pastor,

I'm a regular reader of your column and I do pray that God will continue to bless you in doing your good job. I've been dating this man for three months now, going on to four.

He's 41 years of age and has five children. I will be 22 years old this month. He has been having some issues with his 'home girl'.

They have been living together for 10 years and they have a six-year-old son together, who is his youngest child. He has a very nice personality.

However, his intention was to find someone who makes him happy and he thinks I'm that person. He said he has fallen in love with me, but all he needs is some time to make everything ok because they have been having some issues.

I realise that I've been falling in love with him day by day. He treats me well and I don't really have a problem with him. We have been honest and are talking about things together.

He told me the other day that his intention is for us to live together over the next six months or so then we could try having a child, since I don't have any.

He's very responsible, and I think he'd be a great dad because I listen to how he deals with his children. He and his children have such a great relationship.

Am I crazy for loving a man who already has someone whether they have issues or not? Please, help me, pastor, and pray for me and my family.

Initial Withheld

Dear Writer,

You talk like someone who is crazy. You have been going with a man who has fathered five children and he is living with the mother of his last child.

This man is now telling you that he would like the both of you to live together and to try to have a child together.


That is nonsense, total nonsense. You are sleeping. You need to wake up and run him out of your life.

Very soon you are going to be 22 years old and you cannot reason out that this man sees you as an idiot? Why would you want to allow a man who is 41 years old, and who already has five children, to impregnate you?

Get real. What are the issues this man is having with the woman with whom he lives? Why would he want to leave her?

You think that he is a good man, but I am here to tell you that he is a very irresponsible and wicked man. I wonder what type of work he does, and I also wonder whether he is supporting all his children.

I suggest that you walk away from this man and don't allow your emotions to run away with you. I don't care how much this man will curse me, but I cannot encourage you to continue in this relationship.


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