Pregnant for my man’s friend

January 13, 2020

Dear Pastor,

I am writing you this letter with tears in my eyes. I am 24 years old and I am pregnant with my second child. But the child I am carrying is not for my boyfriend.

He doesn't know that he is not the father and I don't know what to do. I am afraid to tell him. I got involved with one of his friends and we went out; I had too much to drink and he took me to his house and we had sex.

My boyfriend didn't know that I slept out. He is an entertainer, so that night when I went with his friend, he was working.

He trusts me, so he doesn't know that I cheated, and he is very happy that I am pregnant, because he believes that I am carrying his child.

His friend who got me pregnant wants me to leave my boyfriend, but I don't want to because I will have too much to lose.

I am sorry for what I have done. I have a visa and I am thinking of running away and having my baby in the US.

Apart from the guy who got me pregnant, you are the first person I am telling about my problem.

Pastor, I feel bad about this because this is not the first time I have cheated on my boyfriend. It happened with another guy.

I went with the other guy because my boyfriend did not have any money to give to me and I had bills to take care of.

Please, help me Pastor, tell me what to do.


Dear C.H.,

Do not continue to live a lie. You know that your boyfriend did not impregnate you, and the one who impregnated you knows exactly what happened.

Therefore, you should tell your boyfriend the truth. You can tell him that you went out and you had too much to drink, and so you lost control and had sex with his friend, and now you got pregnant.


However, if you are afraid that this man will beat you and physically abuse you in different ways, you should walk away from the relationship without a fuss. It would be very difficult for this man to trust you in the future.

I cannot encourage you to continue to pretend that you are carrying this man's child. So many women have got pregnant and their boyfriends or husbands are not even aware that they are not the fathers.

So these men take care of the children as their very own. If you were to tell this man the truth and he decided that he loved you enough to stay with you, you would have received a tremendous blessing.

You are a very careless, young woman. I am not afraid to say that you are a bad woman.

This is not the first time you have cheated on your boyfriend. So if your boyfriend should tell you that the relationship is over, you would have no one to blame but yourself.

Consider what you should do carefully. But I would suggest that you tell your boyfriend the truth before you give birth.


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